Animated burst of Chinese from two Chinese women in the next cubicle.

Me: "I know you ladies are talking about men, again."

Ling Rae Hong (LRH): "How you know that?"

Me: "I know Mandarin."

Zhang Junli (ZJ): *titters*

LRH: "We not talk about men in Mandarin."

Me: "No?"

LRH: "We talk about men in Shanghainese."

ZJ & LRH: *laughter*

Chris - guys look at my new tattoo!

We peer at the back of the calf obediently.

Us - What is it?

Chris - Dude, it is a portrait.

Us - Is that Bea Arthur?

Chris - Hell yeah she is awesome!

Us - ....

K, I had to flee my schoolwork. I was nearing the end of a take home test for a class when I appear to have hit a series of keys in sequence that closed word without saving it and lost the paper. Rather than screaming or punching the wall I will relate a funny story.

Went to the Tampa campus to talk with an adviser with their international studies program about graduate work in International Studies. The grad student that I met with had been a Poli Sci major. Think Karl Rove with wavy hair and an LL Bean shirt on.

Me- Hi I'd like to see what you think of grad schools with International Studies programs.

Karl - Well you don't want to go here that is for sure. We are way off the beaten path here and the professors don't really know anybody worth knowing...

Me- Ok but-

Karl - Also you really might want to think about this "international studies" focus because nobody can really tell you what that means, Political Science is a degree that means something anyplace you go and you can take pretty much the same classes. It is much more worthwhile...

Me- Well OK and-

Karl - So (leans back and puts his hands behind his head) you focus on poli-sci and a good school, unlike here, can get you a good internship anywhere you want to go. It sounds like you and I think alike on this and I think you're making a good choice.

Me- I was thinking of focusing on Africa or China

Karl - Forget Africa, you'll never make any money there, now China though that is a money maker, always something going on there. Also if you speak Chinese any government agency will snap you up, nobody trusts the Chinese living here anyway, you can't really ever tell who their loyal too anyway, remember that guy out as Los Alamos?

Me - Wasn't he cleared-

Karl - Well maybe but there wouldn't have been suspicion had there not been something going on. Anyay nice to meet you and the best of luck! Just don't apply here.


and then in class today from the quiet kid with greasy hair when asked how he remembered tons of esoteric stats and figures

- I have a 145 IQ and aggregate 1480 SAT scores! Raise the roof bitches!

Hope you can find your backup document, Edit!

You always have the best stuff in this thread

quote:

Karl - So (leans back and puts his hands behind his head) you focus on poli-sci and a good school, unlike here, can get you a good internship anywhere you want to go. It sounds like you and I think alike on this and I think you're making a good choice.

'Yes, but... is it Art?'

(bewildered expressions, verbal and facial)

'Well, what I mean is: you're a poli sci guy, right?'

(resuming control and confidence) Yup.

'So: how often do you get laid?'

quote:

Originally posted by editengine:
- I have a 145 IQ and aggregate 1480 SAT scores! Raise the roof bitches!

Ha! Actually, 1480 is pretty damn good. Although we had a couple people in my class get the full 1600. (Me, I barely got 1380.)

quote:

Originally posted by editengine:
Forget Africa, you'll never make any money there...

Somewhere on the French Riviera, Eeben Barlow is laughing his ass off, and he's not sure why...

Good luck finding your backup, E.

quote:

Went to the Tampa campus to talk with an adviser with their international studies program about graduate work in International Studies.

Oh Jesus H. Fucksticks, the Roveling is a moron. See what happens when you stick someone in a room and have them dispense opinions without ever challenging them? I'll mail you the bullet if you don't have any. What caliber do you use for jobs like this?

fellowEmployee_1: I'm totally loving rocket now.

fellowEmployee_2: I love rocket.



I think there's something in that for all of us, don't you.

quote:

Oh Jesus H. Fucksticks, the Roveling is a moron. See what happens when you stick someone in a room and have them dispense opinions without ever challenging them? I'll mail you the bullet if you don't have any. What caliber do you use for jobs like this?

Elephants are scared of rats.

-you chatting up your workmates?
-just telling them what i like in a man.
-oh aye?
-see when i said to my now husband that that i liked a bit of facial hair he grew a beard, thats how i knew he liked me!
-and look at him, pretending hes 14 again.
-thats what started us off.
-well, you have to get to know your workmates

quote:

Originally posted by theminx:
Hope you can find your backup document, Edit!

You always have the best stuff in this thread

thanks minx, but I think there is a lot of funny stuff people post here.

No duplicate I am afraid. I am about done with redoing the whole thing now though and honestly this is probably better than the original.

quote:

Originally posted by heavyboots:

quote:

Originally posted by editengine:
- I have a 145 IQ and aggregate 1480 SAT scores! Raise the roof bitches!

Ha! Actually, 1480 is pretty damn good. Although we had a couple people in my class get the full 1600. (Me, I barely got 1380.)

granted it has been awhile but I think mine was 1120 or something like that. For Florida public schools that ain't half bad. It was fun to see the kid come alive and stretch his intellect and ego a bit.

lol.
I have no idea why, and it was a long, long time ago, but my aggregate SAT was 1500.

"is your bionicle vulnerable?"

...

"It's not an oil-based paint, it's a finger-based paint!"

-interviewee rebutting vandalism charge on local radio newscast

my cubicle mate, 6:50am:
*groan* "never again will i eat candy for breakfast..."

"hehe, my possible guy-friend is a guitar-playing creative writing student, with an amazing voice "

"scores for you "

--from the NGB

Here we can see clearly the yellow (and pink) tape of the forum community cultural parameters. I could just hear the WGB semiotic ghost's collective cyber cough and extended silence, perhaps punctuated by the hissing of spilled epigrammatic anointments of Lithos battery acid.

hehehe
it amuses me how male-dominated this board is
tempts me to start a "girls-only" thread!

I think there'd be some congratulations. Of course, we'd have to make fun of anyone studying creative writing.

"Did you hear about that guy in Seattle that got denied a liver transplant, because he used medical Marijuana?"

"Did his doctor prescribe it to him?"

"Yep, the transplant committee said he is a potential drug addict. So, he has die."

[Silence]

"Wow, I thought, I was evil. They keep raising the bar."